Category Archives: My Thoughts


Hello everyone,

I haven’t been on here for a while and I have a good reason… Basically I am dying.. Yep you read that right, the Dr said I have about 2 years or less. We are trying to get hospice and other thing’s set up at home to help me and Ray until the end. I have stopped taking the methotrexate and the steroids even through my drs begged me to give it another try. She said maybe in a year or so a new medication might come out that will help.. I said no, I can’t do this anymore.. I hated what the steroids did to me. They changed my whole personality, and it showed in some of my past blogs post’s. All I know to say about that is I am truly sorry about all of it. I have tried for 6 years to fight this disease that has taken so much from me. The methotrexate started to kill of my liver so I had to stop taking it. I do have a few bucket list wishes and I hope I can accomplish them. 1 is to try all of Baskin Robbins ice cream flavors and so far I have tried 4 of them, and I think it will be easy to accomplish this wish! Lol! Since I love ice cream! I have some other wishes, but I can’t talk about them on here now. Later in the summer I can, if I make it that long. You see I no longer can drive, I have no feeling in my feet and up my legs away’s, nor do I have feeling in my hands. I can still write here, I just can’t feel the keys. I sleep a lot, since I am so tired all the time. I haven’t been able to do a lot of thing’s. I no longer make cakes for the charity and I really miss it, I wonder if they miss me? I had to leave my fair job, plus volunteering for the U of I food safety program. Do you think a person’s life matter’s if they can longer do the thing’s they loved or God called them to do? I wonder about that a lot…I wonder if anyone will even miss me when I am gone, or if they even miss me now? I’m sorry if I sound sad, I guess I am. I won’t even make it to my 40th birthday. At times like this you start thinking about where am I going from here? And I do know my home is in Heaven with Jesus. Since I knew what was coming I started being a bit more bold about my beliefs on FB and well it has cost me a lot of friends. People who say they care about you but when it really matters leave you. I guess they we not true friends? Or maybe they didn’t like thinking about what happens after we leave this life? People you have an eternal soul, and there are only 2 roads we travel on. The wide path to Hell that leads to death, or the narrow road that leads to Life. Where will you go? Salvation only come’s from having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and His Truth and Life can be found in the Holy Bible. Satan will lie to you and say you don’t need Jesus that there are many paths to your god or god’s. Satan is a LIAR! He will tell you what you want to hear. My biggest wish is for every one of my family and friends finds Jesus and learns the TRUTH! I want to see you all in Heaven! I don’t know what people will say about me when I am gone? All I hope they will say is that she loved Jesus and her life showed it, that’s what I hope for…


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Posted by on April 11, 2013 in My Thoughts, Uncategorized


This and That…

Hello Everyone,

With all the moving, packing and unpacking I keep forgetting to post a few thing’s going on with us around here.. I hate moving, and to think my parents moved us kids every 3 years while I was growing up! We have found things we forgot about! For instance a couple of years ago we bought our niece’s a couple Christmas present’s wrapped them up in a box and put them away in the closet. And yep didn’t find them until we unloaded the closet in November! LOL!!! I found Abby a cute teddy bear with a bumble bee on its nose at a flee market in the summer a couple of years ago, she LOVES stuffed animals! Also a while ago I bought a Cross for Jacquelyn from an Avon lady. The box was so small that I thought I had lost it! So they got there belated Christmas presents this year along with a few other present’s we bought them. Oh well, I suppose stuff like that happens to us all! πŸ™‚

A couple of weeks ago I decided to take one cake for Community Cakes for an elderly lady. It’s the first cake I have baked in 7 months? I think? I would like to bake more but with my health I know I can’t.. Bummer..

In December I did make two recipes from Food Networks magazine. I wanted to try a couple more but just could not muster up the energy or enthusiasm for it. Here are the two recipes I made. On page 114, the Hot Brown Turkey Sandwich. I really liked this but Ray well, sometimes he frustrates me. He doesn’t like tomatoes on anything, just by themselves with salt and pepper is all he wants. I said oh jee whiz can’t you just try it this way? He said no… grrrrrrr!!!!! He has his weird idea’s and he would say the same about me!! Many years ago we were talking about something and I was confused about some idea’s he had. I don’t remember what we were talking about but as I walked away from him I muttered Ray you are a strange weird man! I didn’t think he heard me.. He did! Ever since then it’s been a running joke with us. He signs all his email, letters and cards to me SWM. We have even decided it will be on his headstone and on mine it will say “Married to a strange weird man”. If your confused about all this, that’s ok. πŸ™‚ Jokes between couples are not often understood by anyone else…

Next Food Network magazine we tried is on page 158 Lidia Bastianich’s Shrimp Scampi, we loved it. Served it with crusty bread to mop up the buttery juices and a salad! Delicious! Also can you be believe it’s my first time making shrimp scampi? It is! I have made many shrimp dishes and this was one of the easiest recipe’s for shrimp and the best I have ever made! We ate all of it! Oh and I did cut the recipe in half so we didn’t eat a full two pounds of shrimp, just one. Two pounds of shrimp would have been way to much!!

We had our first dinner party last night. It was my dad and step-mom. They flew in from Omaha, we don’t get to see them very much. We couldn’t use our dining room yet, to many boxes in there.. Hopefully the next time they come we can eat in there. I made homemade pizza, and not store-bought, dough or sauce either!! All from scratch. It was the first time I got to use my pizza board! LOVED IT!! I also made a sausage pizza soup, with lots of fresh veggies, ceaser salad, and chocolate cream cheese brownies. They loved it! It was so nice to have people over, I haven’t been able to for a long time. We had a great time with them! By the way I will try to post the recipes later in the week.

Well that’s all for now, need to finish up the cake!

Amanda πŸ™‚

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Posted by on January 15, 2012 in My Thoughts


What section of the newpaper do you read first?

Hello Everyone,

This is a topic I have been thinking about for a bit. So what section of the newspaper do you read first? Me? I actually start with the front page and work my way through the rest of the paper. I know a lot of people think newspaper and books are a dying out because of the internet, but I think they will stay put. A lot of people still do not have internet. I love reading my local newspaper everyday. They publish who has passed away, who has DUI’s ect.. I love the Community section in the paper. They put out a survey awhile back asking what we wanted to keep in the paper. I emailed them and said PLEASE keep the recipe of the day! I love that part of the paper. People send in recipes and it’s great to read and try so many different recipes. Some haven’t tasted so well but most of them have. I have had several published in there. I haven’t sent anything in for a while, busy moving and other things. One lady sends in a lot of recipes, and one of them was a yellow cake and it was wonderful. I know I still have it somewhere, just not sure where?? I’ll have to search for it later.. On Monday they publish a Cheers and Jeer’s section. I love reading that part. While most of the time it’s mostly Cheers, there are a few pretty nasty Jeers. I have sent in for that section a couple of times. One time was for a person that was driving crazy next to me one day, he really scared me! I wrote that he shouldn’t be out driving and should go back to driving school and anger management class, or something! That was one crazy man! Another Cheers and Jeers I wrote in one day a couple of years ago. It was early in the morning and I was outside with Casper. Ray was getting ready to leave for work and I was in my nightgown and bathrobe and it was about 40 degrees outside, with spitting snow! When Ray walked out the door he locked the knob! Leaving me outside and he took off before I noticed the door was locked! I didn’t have my cell phone and we didn’t have a key outside, which to me is really a stupid thing to not having a key outside! I started to panic, I could not get back in the house! I went to the road and starting waving like madwomen at any cars that were passing by. One women was in a van and it was full of kids wouldn’t stop for me, made me upset! But then my angel came! I don’t know his name or where he was going, but he let me use his phone to call Ray and I told him YOU LOCKED ME OUT! Ray came home right away. I know Ray didn’t mean to do that, it’s just a habit of his to lock the door on his way out. I was fine, just a little cold and wet by the time Ray got back. SO take my advice put a key to one of your doors outside under a flowerpot or somewhere you know people will not think to look for it! I did!!!! So read your local paper, you never know what you might find in their!! πŸ™‚

I haven’t been, feeling to well. I did start physical therapy yesterday, and I hope it helps my leg. The therapy place is at our local Y. Most of the people are really nice, but there are a few snobs and weirdos mix in as well. So time will tell, I guess…

Until next time..


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Posted by on January 6, 2012 in My Thoughts


What does wealth mean to you?

Hello Everyone,

Merry Christmas to all my wonderful readers!!! I pray the Lord to heap blessing on all of you this Christmas day!!

I thought this was the perfect topic to write about today, since Christmas is the day of giving and receiving gifts. I think the Greatest gift we have been given is the gift of Life that Jesus gave us by being born this day. Wealth to me isn’t how big your house is or how fancy your car is, it’s about generosity. You can save money all your life and think you’re a wealthy person, but unless you have Jesus in your heart and life you are a poor person. When death takes you, you can’t take your money or possessions with you, from dust you were formed and to dust you will return. I see people who think it’s about money and how much they can show off with it, and I pity them. As the Bible says it’s easier for a camel to fit in the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter Heaven. Christmas has become so commercialized that the true meaning has been lost by so many people.

I know I have been talking about our new home and all new things we have been buying for us and the home lately and I wasn’t doing it show off, I am just so excited to have space and room now to have people over. Ray and I for 8 years lived in a 1 bedroom 1 bath, very small house. When we first moved there we fought a lot. We didn’t really know each other at all, and living in such a small house, helps you to realize what’s really important and what’s not. The first 2 years of our life we live in a home that belonged to my parents, we paid the rent and other bills ect. That house had 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms. The house was about 3,000 square feet. I took care of a home health client (he was a quadriplegic) that lived with us, plus Ray did computer consulting. Some thing’s happened and Ray and I decided we needed to move. That move was really hard on us and with people fighting, it was sad… Over the years I have had a lot of complicated relationships with a lot of my family members, I wish it wasn’t that way, but I guess thing’s happen you just can’t stop. So the question I am asking what does wealth mean to you? Is it your kids, family, your house, money? If you have children you should consider yourself wealthy already. A lot people like myself, can’t have children, you all know my health problems ect.. Wealth isn’t how big your house is or what kind of car you drive, or fancy clothes, or jewelry..

Wealth is about a child that was born over 2,000 years ago on this day to give us life! I thank you Jesus Christ for the wealthy gift of live everlasting, without you we would be lost..

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Amanda πŸ™‚

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Posted by on December 25, 2011 in My Thoughts


Have you started making plans for the upcoming holiday season?

Silly question I know for most people, lol!! Most people I know are already planning big gatherings and dinners. Ray and I are just planning on moving over Thanksgiving weekend, and then some! I have spent 2 nights in our new home, rotating between the couch and the floor to sleep. Our pets are starting to adjust living here, Casper wants to look and sniff everywhere, not to mention pee on everything outside. He is a male after all, marking territory, isn’t that what men do?? LOL!! Chester after sniffing around the house yesterday decided at was all good and then went to sleep, he’s our mellow yellow kitty! Minnie on the other hand, has been? Well a handful, to say the least. I took her to the vet to get her updated on her shots and asked for the sedative. They cut the pills up into quarters so I could start with giving her small doses, at first. One quarter pill didn’t affect her at all, so I upped it, to a half a pill for the 30 minute drive to the house. Didn’t work.. She howled all the way over… And for the last 2 days she has been howling as early as 4am! This morning it was 5am.. UGGG!!! I stayed up with her this morning since I had a 8am doctor appointment. When I returned to the house, I fed them as usual and then Minnie started howling again.. I needed some sleep, so I gave her three-quarters of a pill, she really needed to settle down. I think I’ll call the pills her happy pills, because all she wanted to do was follow me around purring at full volume! Plus she was walking around like she was drunk.. Now she is napping with Chester. I know some of you might think it was mean to dope her up like that, but I was afraid she would have a panic attack. She’s only known the other house we lived in. This is Casper and Chester’s 3rd move so they are doing well with the change. I just knew Minnie was going to be handful and I was right.. You see she’s a lot like my mom’s cat Rascal. Rascal was gentil, loving, and scared of people she didn’t know, like Minnie is. After my mom and her husband moved to the house they live in now, my mom found Rascal dead on the steps of her house.. The vet said she died of a heart attack, yes pets have heart attacks as well. That’s what I have feared with Minnie, hence the reason for the happy pills.. I am going to have to give her more Saturday when the movers come with the rest of our furniture, I hate giving them to her, but right now it’s better for her to stay calm…

As for my doctor’s appointment, she is going to have me try injecting the methotrexate instead of taking the pills, she said it would absorb better into my bloodstream, and hopefully work better for me. Living in our new home, is sure a lot closer to all my doctors, and I love not having to drive so far.. And Ray can be home a lot sooner from work!! YEAH!!!!

Well I better go, I have more unpacking to do… I have a feeling I’ll be unpacking until JUNE!! πŸ™‚

Amanda πŸ™‚

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Posted by on November 23, 2011 in My Thoughts


We Bought a New House!

Hello Everyone,

Yep we did it we bought a brand new house! This is the news I have been so excited about and had to wait to write about. I wanted to post about it yesterday, but I was so tired by the time we were done signing papers and shopping, I crashed in the bed when we got back to the house. We haven’t moved into our new house yet, just have hauled some stuff over. We have some stuff being delivered on Saturday and I am going to stay there while Ray works on stuff through the next week in our old house. This whole house hunting deal has taken us more than 6 months, and talk about a learning process for us! This is the 4th house we put a bid on, it’s a lot tougher to buy a house than you think it is. The 1st house was a beautiful house and was what we were looking for, but we were outbid on that one. The 2nd one was ok, I can’t say I liked it as much as Ray did, but we went ahead and bid on that one, but the same thing happened, outbid again… The 3rd one was a whole different story, our bid was accepted, but there were some problems with no permits issued for the outside buildings ect, and we decided to back out. We just didn’t feel right about that place.. I am really happy we went with the 4th house and everything fell into place! It has 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, living room, dining room, kitchen and breakfast area. It has a 3 car garage, and sits in a nice quite corner lot. The best part about this place is that, there are NO STAIRS!! It’s going to be an adjustment living in the city, where now we live in the country. It’s closer to Ray’s work and I won’t have so far to drive to my Dr appts. Since I have a hard time driving, this will be much better for both of us!!!

Here is a couple pictures of my new kitchen! I’ll be able to bake, and cook all kinds of tasty goodies in this kitchen!! πŸ™‚

Until next time!!

Amanda πŸ™‚

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Posted by on November 15, 2011 in My Thoughts


What gift would you like to anonymously send someone?

Hello everyone,

Here is a different topic to talk about today..My hubby and I have already sent a gift semi-anonymously. When I was baking at Ronald McDonald house, I noticed they really needed a new stand mixer. After Ray and I talked about it for a while we decided to buy a new one for them, and only a handful a people know that we did that. The Lord has really blessed us lately so we wanted to give back. I know now it won’t be a secret any longer, but that’s ok…

The other thing we did anonymously, was we would do what we called The 25 Days of Christmas. My mom saw an article about a family back east somewhere that was doing something similar, but they did it for 12 days. Well my mom wanted to take it further than that, hence the 25 Days of Christmas was born. We started out that year with just friends and family that we knew. We would leave little gifts on their doorstep for 25 days leading up to Christmas day. It was never anything to expensive, just a loaf a home-made bread, candy, cookies ect.. We almost were caught many times, we would have to leave the gifts very early in the morning like around 2am or so. When Ray and I got married we continued this for the first few years. We never told any of the people who we were, but we did get cards saying thank you to us, and one person even said thank you for reminding me what Christmas is really about, giving. We have done this for many family’s over the years and their is only one family or couple who did not like it at all! After about the 10th day into it they left me a note saying they had diet concerns and to please not bring anymore food. Well I thought that maybe other gifts would be better like, picture frames, cards ect. Well they did not like that either. The next day I came to their house all of the thing’s we had given them were shoved in a box and a rather nasty note saying STOP WE DO NOT WANT ANYMORE OF YOUR GIFTS! I was very surprised by this and hurt. A couple of days later I left them a letter explaining why we did this and they were the only people out of the maybe 100 people we did this for that acted the way they did, I was really surprised and shocked by their reaction I told them. They never knew who we were and I never went back to there house again. The only thing I knew about them was that they had moved from New York somewhere. The only think I can come up with is that maybe they didn’t celebrate Christmas or were suspicious of the food being bad. I will never know, I guess.

We had to stop doing the 25 Days of Christmas several years ago, mainly because I was sick and it was getting harder to get up in the middle of winter and being barked at by dogs and was getting harder to not get caught.. That’s why I love baking cakes for the charity group. Even through I haven’t baked a cake for them since June? I think? It’s been hard not being able to bake. Being sick these past several months have been very hard. I don’t have any energy at all. I barely get the dishes and laundry done. I feel bad for Ray, he has to do all the heavy lifting and get stuff out of cupboards for me all the time, because I can’t get on my knees, and I can’t reach anything up high. We have a step-stool, but I fell off it and ever since then Ray won’t let me on it, he’s afraid I will fall again. I didn’t hurt myself to bad, just twisted my ankle a bit..

Well I better go for now, I will post my chili recipe tomorrow, and I can’t write about my exciting news yet! RATS!!

Amanda πŸ™‚

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Posted by on November 4, 2011 in My Thoughts